Control, beauty, power, and disruption

The threads I’m pulling on

Author

Allie Lehman
February 02, 2025 • Estimated Reading Time: 5 minutes

Offline Recess is a newsletter that invites you to pause from digital distractions and rediscover the joy of finding inspiration on your own terms, away from the algorithm.

A quick summary: It’s Sunday and today we’re exploring:

  • Life is messy. So are my notes. And that’s the point.

  • A short list of things that stuck offline

  • One great dog

I did not have anyone edit this so if you see a typo, be relieved that I’m a human and not a robot.

Intersections

things that are connecting during my recess

I have this thing where I get overwhelmed messing up a neat room, dirtying up a kitchen, or starting a new notebook. I’ve always been like this. It’s annoying. I annoy me. And I’m trying to work through it because it keeps me from taking action. Sometimes, I’ll look at my clean pots and pans and, instead of cooking, I’ll think about what I can eat that won’t require using them.

This year, I’m reminding myself that life is messy, and the goal isn’t to stay pristine. What kind of impact will I have—on others, on myself, on this planet—if I try to exist without distrupting?

That got deep, so now I’m going to transition into something a little lighter (but still connected…and I get pretty deep below so thanks for following). In my efforts to embrace the mess, I’m really pushing myself to take the most chaotic notes possible—in both my physical and digital journals. Any thought I have, I jot it down. A lot of it starts in my head, sure. But when I put it into words, I take the ideas further. I’m copying and pasting quotes, links, images—it’s all over the place. But somehow, I’m starting to see the threads tying everything together.

Here are the threads that I pulled from my notes this past week:

  • People in power would rather you be isolated, agreeable, and nice to look at—because the moment you’re deeply connected, thinking for yourself, and actively shaping culture, you become a lot harder to control.

  • Today’s “natural” beauty trends—glass skin, “undetectable” work, and hyper-feminine aesthetics—sell themselves as empowerment, but they quietly reinforce binary gender thinking. Beauty standards have always (would triple underline if I could) been political.

  • Shifting my mindset matters as I keep building Wonderly. Swapping “I have to…” for “I get to…” and “Things are busy” for “We’re as booked as we want to be” changes a lot for me. 

  • Emily’s newsletter got me thinking about the Overton window—the idea that, at any given time, only a narrow range of political ideas are considered acceptable, and it’s public opinion, not politicians, that sets those boundaries. But honestly, this isn’t just about politics. I see it play out in my own life all the time. Something that initially feels wild, weird, even ugly, slowly seeps into my brain—until suddenly, it’s a trend I fully embrace. Or at least, think I do.

  • The brave and inspiring act of immigration to the United States led to my existence and for that I am thankful.

  • Many, many disjointed thoughts about paywalls and Substack and memberships and newsletters. I’ll be writing about this more via Wonderly’s newsletter this year. 

How do you empty your brain? Alright, back to journaling for now.

Sticky offline things

things that stood out over the week

  • This movie trailer is so funny to me. I picture the lead reading the script and saying, “Do I have to hold this camera the entire time?”

  • Sweet Tart ropes!!!!

  • I made those viral cottage cheese bagels covered in everything bagel spice (I can’t eat yeast. Who cursed me?) and they are good!

  • Stretching is nice.

  • Lighting candles at dinner even if you’re eating hashbrowns!

“Brings you back”

a quote that stuck with me

"In this life, you're meant to have one great dog," I said.

"One that shifts something deep inside you, in a way you never saw coming. He shows up, maybe when you need him most, maybe when you're too lost to see it. And in the smallest, most ordinary moments, he changes you." I paused, thinking of all the nights I trudged through, feeling like I was carrying the weight of the world alone.

"He's the one who makes it bearable, who brings you back when you're teetering on the edge. He doesn't try to explain or preach. He just stays there, showing you a kind of love you didn't think existed."

Thank you, Hanna, for sending it to me unprompted ❤️ 

P.S. You’ve enjoyed this newsletter over the years, you can help contribute to the cost of publishing. I don’t have any intention of putting up a paywall but you can Venmo me @alliepal or send a tip via Paypal (this account is under my maiden name Jocson because Paypal makes it nearly impossible to change your name). Thank you to all who tip me!

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